

And another 10 cent for the wax.
And if you are interested in the final product.
Sometimes we feel like we have to change us in order to be loved or accepted. I want everyone to know that there is someone in this world that will love you and accept you (flaws and all) for who you are. We are all unique.
I read of a man who stood to speak

at the funeral of a friend.
He referred to the dates on her tombstone
from the beginning...to the end.
He noted that first came the date of her birth
and spoke of the following date with tears,
but he said what mattered most of all
was the dash between those years.
For that dash represents all the time
that she spent alive on earth...
and now only those who loved her
know what that little line is worth.
For it matters not, how much we own;
the cars....the house...the cash.
What matters is how we live and love
and how we spend our dash.
So think about this long and hard...
are there things you'd like to change?
For you never know how much time is left,
that can still be rearranged.
If we could just slow down enough
to consider what's true and real,
and always try to understand
the way other people feel.
And be less quick to anger,
and show appreciation more
and love the people in our lives
like we've never loved before.
If we treat each other with respect,
and more often wear a smile...
remembering that this special dash
might only last a little while.
So, when your eulogy's being read
with your life's actions being rerun...
would you be proud of the things they
say about how you spend your dash?
Its kind of weird aint it? I grew up in a world when Michael Jackson was so popular. It was after the release of his Thriller album. And all of a sudden, we one day woke up to a world which was without its very own King of Pop. I think this really shows how fragile life is. It was a death that no one expected. Even at his death, the King of Pop still had so many ongoing dramas. It seemed like his family wasn't allowed to breathe as they had to handle so much things. Who say fame was great. There is such a lack of personal privacy. I would rather lead my own quiet peaceful life. Even though i wasn't much of a fan of Michael Jackson, the fact is, he is the heart of music when he lived, and for that i respected him for that.
Goodbye King of Pop.
Now i am trying to think what i wanna do after my NS. It's always good to plan ahead. But after having lunch with one of my poly lecturers, I am kind of confused. I have always aimed for a Degree in Commerce at UWA or something, but my lecturer encouraged me to go for an arts course or the accounting degree at ACCA. Ughs, let's leave that to another day.
Driving or maintaining a car is freaking expensive man. I had to drive down to Malaysia just to pump petrol when my family was overseas. However you cannot discredit the convenience part of having a car. And i just realised my car had freaking alot of scratches. And my mum is blaming me for it. UH SHIT. I didn't even bang or hit anything yet after 4 months. watever.
And just yesterday, got caught for playing soccer at 1am by the police, they had nothing better to do. Got my details recorded down AGAIN. Hopefully nothing else happens. And that is not going to stop me from continuing my night soccer!
-life's like that
The time has come. This is the time that I have been dreading about. The time to let go of them.
Of my 2 partners who are the closest to me.
Of my god daughter.
Of my good friends.
Of the society people.
Its time. It just feel so awkward you know. Its like you don't wanna let go, but you know you have too. It not something that I am facing by myself. I am sure the rest of the guys are feelings this too. Its like for the past 1 year, we have been so super nonsensical busy to the limit. And all of a sudden life's so aimless and helpless. Like a transitional period. Trying to find something new to occupy the time. I can't possible stick to Jia Huey or Purdey. They have their own cca and group to manage. Its time to let go.
Its just a matter of time now.
Its the transitional period.
School is back. And it sucks. They just chose me for attachment. But the thingy is I have IS supposedly next semester. Its just so shitty. If they choose me for attachment then why can't they use their bloody brains and put me into IS this semester? LIKE HELLO!! KNOCK KNOCK!! USE YOUR BRAINS PLEASE!!
Now I really dunnoe where my life is heading in the short term. I just feel so like I have no control of my life. I am living day by day, just trying to get past the day, trying to make life as fun as possible, hanging around different people, exploring different things.
Its the transitional period.
1 month has passed since the death of my granny, and you know, a part of me pines for her no matter how strong I try to pretend or smoke screen it. I think for the past month my acting has been really good. It was really crucifying travelling to and fro for school during the funeral, but somehow I just manage to pull it off. And I managed to hide so many things inside of me till even the people closest to me don't even know of. Or is it that I am just retreating back to my shell? Life has changed so dramatically in just 1 month. Therefore never live your life with regrets as I had. Appreciate the people around you.
Its the transitional period.
-life's like that
Goodbye.
I learned that we cant choose how we feel, but we can choose what to do about it.
This past week is one of the most exhausting weeks of my life.
I had BA's orientation and my paternal grandmother's death at the same time.
Let's start with the happy news first.
My group which is known as Sensuale Jazz during orientation rocked the house and brought the school down. We scooped up the Best Group, Best ASCO, Best SCO and Best Performance Award. Most of the other groups won only 1 or 2 awards. So we really were that fantastic.
Of cos the credit goes to my student coordinators who were brilliant, exciting and just super high. This is probably the easiest leadership you can ever get becos they are so independent and yet they still listen to my partners and I.
SENSUALE JAZZ! YOU ROCK MY WORLD!
now to the bad news.
my paternal granny left us without any warnings on 4/4/09.
Life is so unpredictable aint it.
It sounds just so unfair.
Now i am without my grandparents be it the maternal or paternal side.
And one of my greatest wishes was to have them at my wedding, or to hold on to my grandchildren.
Now it is impossible.
Now i am heading to Hainan, China in 2 hours time, so as to bury her body in her hometown beside my grandfather, just as she always wanted.
Sometimes I feel that I should not care about orientation so much. After all I had lost a loved one. The traveling to and fro to school and back to the wake was killing me.
I had to wake up at 6am or earlier, left for school, and at 9pm reach back to the wake, to spend much needed time with my family, and stay awake till 1pm before repeating the same thing the next day.
And now I had even delayed my flight to China for a day just to go for orientation.
Was it worth it?
Honestly, No.
And some of my closest friends don't even seem to bother at all.
That just sucks.
They seem to want fun rather than their friends.
It was just so disappointing.
Life is just so unfair.
If only I could turn back time.
I was having lunch with one of my lecturers the other day.
And she was saying she felt worried about my generation people as she feel we have very little ideals and we are unimaginative.
Are we really that bad?
I do think its the way we have all been brought up.
After being taught to do things as we are told for the past 10 years.
All of a sudden being asked to start thinking on how to do things instead of being shown the way might be a little out of the comfort zone.
The education system has been very "inflexible".
Several of my American tutors have commented to me that they feel we have no freedom in the education system. It is very rigid as they say.
Afterall, what do you expect a nation with very little freedom as shown in a survey to be?
Or a nation which seems to be very socialist, almost communist, but they call themselves Social Democrats.
Don't get me wrong. I aint blaming the govt for all of our problems. After all they brought us to become a modern country. But it seems that they are running out of ideas on how to make the country more inventive.
We are even being taught on how to be creative in ngee ann. How stupid is that?
You just have to look at the govt to see the kind of messages that they have been sending out.
First was the Budget Terminal. They decided to hold a competition to decide the name for the new budget terminal. After reviewing thousands of entries, the winner was " THE BUDGET TERMINAL". I am super sure there were other more good ideas than this. Even a 7 year old kid could have came up with something cool! But no, it was called THE BUDGET TERMINAL.
Now, again the govt are showing some signs of idiotism. They recently held a competition to name 3 formula 1 turns in the Singapore Grand Prix.
First was at the Benjamin Sheares Bridge.
Second was at the Memorial Hall at City Hall.
Lastly was at the Supreme Court.
After going through more than 1,400 suggestions, the winning entries are:
1. The Sheares
2. Memorial
3. Singapore Swing
Gods.
I was stunned by this.
This govt is really sending out the wrong messages.
I feel so insulted to be part of Singapore after this.
This is really belittling Singaporeans creativeness.
In a way, it is kind of disappointing.
I expected alot more from this govt of ours.
As the saying goes, the more you expect, the heavier you would fall.
This was a great fall.
Who actually understand the reason of Valentine's Day.
This is just a sad depiction of our world and the greedy human race.
Things has lost its true and real meaning including Valentine's Day & Christmas.
Who actually knew that Feb 14 was a day that was put aside to remember Father Valentine, A priest who was killed by the Roman Emperor Claudius for allowing the marriage of Christians which was banned at that time.
The world took it and commercialized Valentine's Day.
And some way roses came into the pictures. Gods knows why it became a symbol of Valentine's Day.
Who actually remembered Christmas was first celebrate that God gave us Jesus Christ on that day. It was known as the season of giving because of this priceless gift that we were given.
Or anyone knows how Santa Claus is created. The jolly old Father Christmas was known as Saint Nicholas because he had a habit of putting coins into people's shoes that were left outside the door. And the world came and took it and commercialized Christmas. Even Saint Nicholas face was changed to Santa Claus. 



And the true meaning of Christmas was lost.
IT is just so disappointing.
Why cant humans just be less greedy.
Is it too much to ask for?
I think so.
A man once tried to change the world to believe in what he believed. Time passed and the world did not change.
So he tried to change his nation. Time passed and the nation did not change.
He then tried to change his friends and families. But again the friends and families did not change.
By that time he was an aging old man, and before he died on his bed, he realized that he should have changed himself first. But it was too late.
I tried my best to change myself. But it was to no effect.
Maybe it is too much to ask for.
-life's like that